The Uchiha's Epitaph
by Dalxein
Summary: After Kyuubi drives Naruto berserk at the Valley of the End, Naruto quits the shinobi life and swears never to kill again, having taken the life of his best friend. [NaruHarem]
1. Mother?

Okay, so I'm breaking my 'only two fics at a time' rule…

A; I don't own Naruto. Never have, (most likely) never will.

B; I'm horrible at starting fics. The first few paragraphs will probably be shit… Just read past those, and _then_ see if you want to read the rest.

C; If you're going to insult me, actually find something I did _wrong_ first. I don't make spelling errors as I actually _USE_ a spell checker before posting these, and I'm _pretty_ sure my grammar is damn good… Now, as you saw the disclaimer, I can go ahead and say that aside from those two points, this is _MY _variation of the canon Naruto plot, and there's really nothing for you to complain about… (Notice, I said 'variation'… I don't own this, nor the original)

* * *

Kyuubi is not a _nice_ fox… in fact, most would say he was downright evil. And they're right…

One Uzumaki Naruto was about to learn this first hand…

Naruto and Sasuke were battling in the Valley of the End. 'A fitting place' as Sasuke put it… Until Sasuke killed him, that is… **"Oi… Gaki…"**

"Ehhh… WHAZZAMABIGFOX!!!" Naruto yelled, waking up right in front of the massive cage that held in the Kyuubi. "Oh… right… it's you… what do _you_ want?"

"**We're dead, brat…"** The fox let this sink in for a moment.

"WHAT!?"

"**Your Uchiha friend would have snapped you like a twig if it weren't for me… you should be **_**thankful**_**…" **The fox boomed.

"Sasuke… killed me?" Naruto asked halfheartedly.

"**I can heal it, of course… but…" **The fox started, as red chakra started flowing over Naruto. **"In exchange, I want you to… **_**RIP HIM TO SHREDS!!!**_**"**

As Sasuke walked over to investigate the strange red glow coming off of Naruto's body, he was greeted by a fist to the face. A firmly one-sided battle ensued, until the fox began laughing maniacally in his head, and Naruto's world went black. When he regained himself, he looked around. Sasuke wasn't there… _Weren't we fighting?_ As the blond took a step, he heard a 'squish' under his feet. He'd stepped into a puddle of blood. Following it with his eyes, he came upon Sasuke… or what was left of him…

Quickly he covered his face, shaking his head violently. Pulling his hands away, he saw the blood covering his arms. Falling backward, he shuffled up into the rocks, and cried. He'd killed his best friend. Unbeknownst to him, the Kyuubi had used the sum of his influence over Naruto to drive him berserk… He couldn't take over control of the body, but he had enough strength to make Naruto's control falter.

---

When Kakashi came upon the scene, he knew from the sight of it he would have thrown up if he hadn't fought in the Iwa wars… what he found here was on par with some of his most disturbing memories of that time… it even took him a few seconds to recognize the body. It was Sasuke. Glancing around, he saw Naruto, huddled against the rock face, shuddering violently. When he walked up to him, the blonde, his hair now a matted red, tried his best to back himself into the very rocks. Sasuke was Kakashi's favorite student. Sasuke was everyone's favorite… Naruto knew he'd be mad… he'd curse, wail, beat him, and leave him for dead… Kakashi then did the last thing Naruto expected; he picked him up.

"It's all going to be okay, Naruto…" His silver-haired sensei said silently, and then turned to his canine companion. "Pakkun… go find the nearest ANBU squad, and lead them here to… take care of Sasuke…"

"Y-yes Kakashi…" Pakkun replied. He'd been averting his eyes and holding his breath. The smell of so much blood in the air was almost overpowering, and the scene was horrific enough Kakashi was sure at least _one_ of the ANBU that would be arriving was going to empty his stomach at the sight of it…

---

Two days later, Kakashi was leaning up against the wall, along with six Genin and a Chuunin… The last member of Team Seven, Team Eight, and Team Ten, both of the other two Jounin were busy trying to calm the persistent mob trying to break into the hospital to finish off the boy who 'wiped out' the Uchiha clan.

When Tsunade finally came out of the room, flanked by Shizune and Jiraiya, she took the clipboard in Ino's hands, looked it over, and frowned. "Only three…?" She asked.

"Tsunade-sama…" Kakashi said. "How is he?"

"Well… it took enough sedatives to kill off an ANBU squad, but we got him to sleep a good five hours last night…" As Tsunade said this, the two ANBU guards at the door flinched. Mostly because these two were on duty last night as well, and knew, sadly, that it was pretty much true…

"Can we…" Kakashi started, as Sakura pushed past him. The guards knew better than to stop her, with the crazed look in her eyes, as well as those of the Godaime Hokage who was intent to chase her down before she could hurt Naruto. He'd killed Sasuke. _HER_ Sasuke… she was intent of returning the favor.

As the pink-haired girl burst into the room, Naruto looked up at her. The room was completely _covered _in flowers, 'get well soon' cards, and even a few bowls of cold and uneaten ramen… despite the cheery, ungodly happy mood the room was meant to set, the patient inside seemed to suck all the life from it… Her first thought upon seeing the look in his eyes was that he was simply dead inside, until a split second later when he recognized her. For that brief moment, he seemed alive again… "Sa… ku…" He barely choked out the first two Hiragana of her name before he broke down again…

Tears streamed down his cheeks, his shoulders heaving vehemently as he choked down an anguished cry. The first thing he saw of her since Sasuke's death was her showering him with a spiteful glare… "Oh damn it… not again…" Tsunade said as she walked over to the boy. "Shh… it's okay, Naruto…" She cooed, trying to calm him down.

"He's… not doing so well." Shizune said, as she stood next to Sakura in the doorway. "We would appreciate it if you left now… come back tomorrow with the others if you want to talk to him."

Sakura let herself be shuffled out the door, her face now plastered with the same dead look Naruto held before she entered. This did not go unnoticed by the others in the hallway, and the look spread like a plague.

---

"Why do you think… Naruto just _fell apart_ like that?" Ino asked as they waited in the hallway outside Naruto's room the next day. Today, twelve people were standing in what was seemingly becoming Naruto's personal waiting room… Kakashi, Sakura, Hinata, Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji, Kiba, Team Gai and surprisingly, Gaara… He and his sister were still in town after what happened with the Sound Five, and he'd wanted a chance to look in on his friend. Team Gai was lead here by their sensei to 'Rekindle Naruto's Flames of Youth!' or some such thing… Shikamaru convinced himself he was just following Chouji to see Naruto, but both of them wanted to find out just what was wrong with the blonde. Kiba wanted to look in on his friend and make sure Hinata was going to be okay visiting him. Sakura felt bad about yesterday, and Ino was simply curious. Kakashi, of course, was doing his best to be a good Sensei, and make sure Naruto was doing better.

"I… I don't know." Sakura answered.

"Naruto…" Kakashi started, trying to explain what he could without breaking the Sandaime's law. "He had a lot of emotional 'baggage' before this, but he always kept it locked away under that happy face of his… Now that the happy face is gone, he just can't hold it in any longer…"

His words only had a few moments to sink in before Tsunade came back out of Naruto's room again, this time alone. "Hokage-sama..." Ino started. "Why did you have us do _that _mission yesterday? It didn't make much sense…"

"There… is no _simple_ way to say it…" Tsunade said, sadly. "Naruto is adamant about never letting something like this happen again. Even to the point of swearing never to kill another person…"

"And when you told him being a Shinobi _meant_ killing?" Kakashi asked.

After a moment, Tsunade fished something out of her robes, and tossed it to Kakashi. He was instantly confused… The dents and scratches were all too familiar. It was definitely Naruto's forehead protector… "When I reminded him killing was part of being a shinobi, he threw that at me."

Every one of the Genin was shocked beyond reason. Naruto had always said he was going to be Hokage one day… that he would be the greatest shinobi of all time. Even Gai was visibly shocked. This simply shook their world apart at the seams. If there was one constant in the world, it was that one knucklehead ninja was always cheery and aiming for the top. The sky wasn't nearly the limit to him, but now he just lost all will to better himself. If this could happen to _Naruto_, what could possibly be next? And this was answered as Kakashi fell to his knees, tears threatening to spill over in his visible eye.

_This is all my fault…_ Kakashi thought. _If I'd only paid more attention to Naruto… and saw the way Sasuke was acting… I could have STOPPED this, dammit!_ Kakashi smashed his fist into the floor, leaving a large crack along the linoleum. "My fault… all of it…"

This was truly a day for unexpected things, as Gai walked over and smashed his knee into Kakashi's jaw. "Kakashi, my eternal rival… You are not the only one to blame for this tragedy." Gai said, holding out his hand to the Jounin now lying dumbfounded on the floor. "Although you may bear some fault for this, it was the boy's own actions that killed him; and _ITS _fault for Naruto's condition…" When Kakashi refused to be helped up, or stand at all for that matter, Gai assumed the 'Good Guy Pose' and added; "Now, where is that hip attitude of yours? You _ARE_ still my eternal rival, and I can't let what youth you have left waste away under these dark emotions…" Everyone was shocked… not once did Gai scream something about the 'Flames of Youth'… "NOW! LET US GO REKINDLE YOUR PUPIL'S FLAMES OF YOUTH!!!" Yup… spoke too soon…

---

Upon entering, Tenten clasped her hands over Lee's already open mouth before he could scream anything at the depressed blonde. After about two seconds of that ruckus, the group grew quiet once more. The room hadn't changed much, but it was noticeable. There were fewer flowers, a few of them now sitting in the sink to one side of the room. The small stack of letters had grown slightly; there was even a love letter from an anonymous sender haphazardly tossed in with them. Oddly enough, Hinata blushed when she saw it had been opened, but she never said a word about it. The mirror on the far side of the room was also broken for some reason, and an eerie music, cheerful yet dark, emanating from a small open box on the same table as the letters permeated the room…

The most startling changes to the room had to do with the occupant himself… An IV was stuck in his heavily bandaged left arm, a dark red liquid everyone could only assume was blood slowly flowing into his body. His bed had been exchanged for another one sporting leather restraints. His legs were bound at the ankles by what appeared to be hard leather shackles, each complete with its own padlock. This too, wouldn't have been a surprise if there were any reason for it… but Naruto seemed to be lost in his own little world as he stared at the photo album open in his hands, his ankles being the only part of him restrained. "Naruto? Naruto… you have guests…" Tsunade said as she walked up to him, trying to sound as sweet and motherly as she could in the depressing state of the mood.

"What happened to his-" Ino started to ask, only to be 'shushed' from behind by Shizune, who'd just entered the room.

"If you mean his arm…" Shizune muttered silently, watching as her sensei gently shook Naruto's shoulder. "Last night, for a short while, Naruto-kun became… self-destructive." Gasps and looks of shock flowed over the group, save maybe Gaara. "We'd already taken all the weapons and sharp implements out of the room just in case, but Naruto-kun is quite a bit more cunning than most people give him credit for… He started smashing the flower vases until he found a piece that could be used to cause the injury under those bandages."

"So then…" Sakura muttered. "It's my fault he…"

"No…" Shizune said, watching Tsunade as she tried to coax Naruto out of his mental firewall with a bowl of ramen. "He was bound to do it eventually. It's just lucky Tsunade-sama and I were working late… we heard the crashing and were able to subdue him, but…" She looked down, fighting back tears. "The gash on his arm… If he were anyone else, it would've rendered his arm useless even if he didn't die from blood loss…"

"'If he were anyone else'?" Shikamaru asked. "What do you mean by that?"

Shizune paled, only slightly, but just enough to be noticed by the Group. "I… I didn't mean anything, Naruto-kun's just…" She thought for a second. "Lucky! Or… unlucky, depending on how you think about it…"

"Shizune, that's enough!" Tsunade barked from across the room.

"No, what's going on!?" Sakura asked angrily, walking up to Shizune and stretching herself as tall as she could. "What's wrong with Naruto?" She stormed over to Tsunade, again trying to raise herself to eye level with her, and failing. "What's so _different _about him?" she then walked up to Naruto's bedside, trying to get his attention. "Naruto? Answer me, Naruto! _NARUTO!_" She yelled, pulling her hand back to knock the photo album out of his hands, only to see him tense slightly. _He thinks I'm going to hit him? _She thought, and for the first time, got a look at the pictures in the small book. On the first visible page was the 'roster' photo for Team Seven, Kakashi ruffling Naruto and Sasuke's hair while Sakura stood smiling between them. The next page had two photos, both pictures of Team Seven during two of their various D-Rank missions, one of those pictures she took herself…

"Sakura…" Naruto muttered, closing the binder, tears forming in his eyes. "If you're going to hit me, then just _do it_ and get it over with…"

Everyone in the room was shocked speechless. Naruto was practically _telling_ Sakura to hit him… "Naruto…" Sakura muttered, lowering her hand and shifting into a more relaxed stance, trying to make herself seem as harmless as she could. "Why would I hit you?"

Naruto either sighed or scoffed, he did it with so little energy, no one could tell. He was starting to make Shikamaru look like a brat on a sugar high… "I killed Sasuke…"

Sakura and Ino both winced when he said it. They were probably hit the hardest by his death, aside from Naruto himself… "Naruto, I'm not going to-"

"_I'VE BEEN BEATEN ENOUGH TIMES TO KNOW WHEN IT'S GOING TO HAPPEN DAMN IT, SO JUST DO IT AND BE DONE WITH IT!!!_" Naruto roared, glaring at the girl while tears streamed down his cheeks in waves.

What happened next put all the rest of the day's previous surprises to shame, as Gaara stepped forward, stood in front of Naruto and firmly struck his cheek. "_That_ is for being an idiot. _NOT_ killing the Uchiha." Naruto looked up at his friend with a dumfounded gaze, as did the rest of the crowd in the room when Gaara suddenly turned to walk back outside. "You and I _both_ know _you_ weren't the cause of this." When he passed through the doorway, he stopped and turned back to Naruto. "My sister and I will be in town for a few days… if you need to talk." And with that, he walked down the hall and out of sight.

---

-Later on that same day-

"You did _what_!?" Temari shrieked. "_Hitting him_ was probably the _worst_ thing you could've done then!" Gaara stood there, listening to his sister rant for the better part of an hour about what he did wrong in that situation… Gaara was still trying to get the hang of this 'caring' nonsense…

---

-Back in the hospital, just after Gaara left-

"I… don't understand." Ino said. "If it wasn't Naruto… I thought he lost control…"

Tsunade barely heard Naruto call her name, he said it so silently she was the only person in the room who heard him. "Naruto… you want me to show them out?" Tsunade asked, and Naruto shook his head. "You… want them to know… the truth?" Naruto nodded halfheartedly. "…Are you sure?" Naruto thought for a moment, his nod barely noticeable from a distance. "Do you want to tell them?" Naruto shook his head once more. "You want _me_ to tell them?" Naruto nodded.

Shizune heard Tsunade sigh heavily at Naruto's response. "Come on, everyone… let's find an empty room." Shizune said, leading everyone out. Everyone in the group couldn't help but stay a moment to look at Naruto before they broke their gaze one by one and followed Shizune out. Even then, Sakura, Hinata, Ino and Tenten stayed back and stared at the boy. As young women, they were privy to the keen feminine ability to empathize with others, and each felt what must have been a shard of the unbearable pain and sadness in Naruto's heart.

Tsunade scrutinized each of the girls in turn as they stared at the blonde boy. Each bore a look of compassion and sadness. They wanted to _help _the boy, in any way they could… "It's hard to believe sometimes, isn't it?" Tsunade asked, knocking them out of their stupor. "That he and the rest of you are still just little kids…"

Tsunade walked out of the room with the four girls at her heels, heading down the hall to another room, where Kakashi leaned against the doorframe. "Come on in, then…" He muttered lazily, letting them in before following and closing the door behind him. "Now, everyone, we would appreciate it if you didn't interrupt the Godaime after she starts talking…"

"Why not?" Kiba asked, instantly silenced when Tsunade cracked her knuckles in response. Everyone made sure to make as little noise as possible; Chouji even dropped his bag of chips in fear.

"That's why…" Kakashi muttered.

"So shut up and listen, dammit!" Tsunade spat, glaring down the Genin. When she knew she had their undivided attention, she sighed. "That's better… Naruto… apparently he wants me to tell you all what's going on with him, and I'm not going to let you _belittle _this." She leaned up against the bed on the far side of the room, her right hand firmly clasped over the side of her face, trying to massage away her apparent headache. "This regards the village's _highest_ law, set down by the Sandaime twelve years ago. Even _I_ couldn't say anything without Naruto's permission, so just shut up and let me say what Naruto wants me to say…" Her tone gave no hint of lenience. Either they stayed quiet, or she'd send them through a wall… it was just that simple.

"I… think you've scared them enough, Hokage-sama…" Kakashi muttered.

"Okay, then…" Tsunade mumbled, taking in a deep breath before speaking again. "About twelve years ago, the Kyuubi attacked Konoha. Ever since then, we've altered history texts and records so that none of your generation would know what really happened that day…" Lee and Kiba both looked like they were about to ask a question, and both of them were instantly silenced by Gai and Kakashi's hands over their respective mouths. "What you've been taught is that the Yondaime killed Kyuubi. Simple, and partially true… Kyuubi's physical form was destroyed, but his spiritual form, along with all his power, the part of it no human can destroy, needed to be sealed away. The only container pliable enough being a human, he sealed Kyuubi into a newborn child, namely his…" Tsunade caught herself before continuing, entranced by her own tale to the extent that she nearly gave out information Naruto himself didn't know yet… "Anyway, the reason Naruto breaks down so easily is because he's had to endure the torment of the villagers and shinobi… a good eighty percent of the populace hates him for it, and at least twenty have tried to physically harm him over the last decade…" Tsunade could see tears welling up in the eyes of each of the girls, especially Sakura and Ino, who unknowingly contributed to his monumental abuse. Noticing the looks of disbelief and regret on the boys as well… She barely managed to hold back her own tears when she saw Shizune start to sniffle and dab her eyes with a handkerchief. "All of that, he hid behind a mask that I'm not sure even he knew he'd put up… and when this happened… he just couldn't keep it up, and everything he held back behind that happy facade…"

"Tsunade-sama…" Kakashi muttered, earning him a glare from the Sannin, before he pointed over to the corner, where Gai and Lee stood, openly crying in each other's arms.

…_Maybe we _should_ wrap this up…_ She thought. "We… I… would like everyone to help him as much as they can. Although he might not understand…" Tsunade muttered.

"W-why not?" Hinata asked, finally making her presence known to the group.

Oddly, Shizune was the one to answer. "Well, as you can imagine, he hasn't gotten much positive attention over the years…" Wiping away the tears cascading down her cheeks, she continued; "Forced to endure a demon's torture simply because he contains one sealed inside of him…" She muttered, quite audibly. "What has this world come to, that our poor Naruto need endure such monsters?"

"So, Naruto contains the Kyuubi… that explains a few things." Shikamaru muttered. "Such a troublesome predicament this has turned out to be…"

"So then… when you sent us…" Ino started, before Tsunade continued.

"Naruto has chosen to resign his commission as a shinobi. In his current condition, coupled with the village's views on him, Naruto most likely would be unable to support himself financially. That is why I had Genin squads Eight and Ten research possible occupations for him." Tsunade said, trying to make such a simple explanation sound as intelligent and thought-out as possible.

"You had us running around town looking for _jobs_ he could do." Kiba snapped sarcastically. "I don't see why the hell _we_ had to do his dirty work…"

At the sight of Tsunade tensing up, every facet of her body screaming for a rampage starting with the Inuzuka boy, Kakashi and Shizune readied themselves to physically restrain her if need be, although they both knew they wouldn't be enough to do more than give the Genin a few seconds to run. Slowly, she seemed to calm down, her rage was still easily noted in her tone as she spoke again, however. "You have no idea what he would have to go through, do you?"

"K-Kiba-kun…" Hinata muttered, catching the attention of the room. "You saw the l-looks everyone g-gave us when _we_ asked f-for him… A-and out of all the sh-shops we ch-checked, only three would g-give him work…"

"If it were Naruto…" Ino said, taking up Hinata's point. "They would have run him out… chased him down… who knows what all they'd do to him. I don't think he'd be able to take it the way he is now."

"And that is exactly why I had you do that…" Tsunade added.

"Wait…" Tenten started, causing everyone to turn their attention to her. "I'm sure my…"

"Yes, we know. We've already checked into that…" Tsunade muttered.

"You have?" Tenten asked.

"Yup!" Ino answered, trying to lighten the mood by acting more cheerful than she felt.

"Alright, Kakashi…" Tsunade said, prompting the man to walk over to her before being handed a small scroll. "You take this, and these brats, and go talk to Naruto about his daily schedule from now on."

"Okay, then… you heard the Hokage… Let's go…" Kakashi muttered, leading the group out into the halls. The girls lagged behind again, however, especially Sakura, who remained just inside the room.

"Shizune, I'll need you to dig up some paperwork…" Tsunade muttered, her head lowered to the floor, apparently examining her feet. "You know we can't leave Naruto alone right now, so I-"

Shizune spoke up before Tsunade could bring herself to tears. "I know what you're going to say, Tsunade-sama… and I'd-"

"Sakura, come on…" Kakashi muttered, breaking her and the other girls in the hallway from their reverie.

"Erm… yes, Kakashi-sensei…" Sakura replied.

Moments later, they were all gathered in Naruto's room once more, Naruto now a few pages further along in his photo album. "Naruto… I…" Sakura muttered. As the boy in question glanced up at her, she saw deep red marks just under his eyes. _He was crying?_ "I'm sorry… for everything…" Naruto's eyes widened almost immeasurably before he nodded and turned his attention back to the book in his lap.

"Naruto, Tsunade-sama asked me to relay some information to you…" Kakashi muttered, waiting until Naruto nodded, even without looking up, to continue. Opening the scroll and looking it over for a moment, Kakashi then passed it to Naruto, who set it atop his album. "Mondays and Tuesdays; working at Yamanaka Flowers, Wednesdays at Higurashi Weapons, Thursdays and Fridays at Ichiraku Ramen, and Saturdays here at the hospital with Sunday as a 'free day'. Specific times are specified in the scroll."

"What is this?" Naruto asked, his voice low and slightly grating.

"Your new work schedule…" Kakashi answered, pulling an orange book from one of his pockets and flipping it open with one hand.

Ino and Tenten turned to each other excitedly. "We get to work with Naruto!" Ino muttered.

"I know!" Tenten said. "There's no _way_ he can stay gloomy with us around to cheer him up!"

"Yeah!" Ino cheered as she high-fived Tenten comically.

Sakura sighed. He had someone to support him everywhere but where he needed it most; here at the hospital. He'd have Ino at her parent's shop, Tenten at her parent's, and the only two people who worked at the small ramen stand both cared about him… but here? Thinking for a moment, she resigned herself to her decision, knowing she had to ask Tsunade the next time she saw her.

Just then, Tsunade and Shizune walked into the room, the younger of the two walked over and wrapped her arms around an unsuspecting Naruto. "Come on…" She muttered, turning Naruto's head towards hers and wiping away what semblance of tears were left on his cheeks. "Let's clean you up and get you home… you've got a big day ahead of you…"

Naruto looked at the odd woman in confusion for a moment before Tsunade spoke up, resisting the urge to ruffle the blonde ex-shinobi's hair with all her being. "Tch… you'd better listen to your mother, brat…"

"M-mo-mother?" Naruto asked, looking back to Shizune with a look of shock, fear, hope, and just a hint of excitement.

Shizune chuckled, wiping away her own tears of joy. "If you'll have me, Naruto-kun…"

---

(Earlier-)

"Shizune, I'll need you to dig up some paperwork…" Tsunade muttered, her head lowered to the floor, apparently examining her feet. "You know we can't leave Naruto alone right now, so I-"

Shizune spoke up before Tsunade could bring herself to tears. "I know what you're going to say, Tsunade-sama… and I'd like… to adopt Naruto myself…"

"Sh-Shizune…" Tsunade muttered in disbelief.

"I've thought about it, Tsunade-sama… and that's what I've decided." Shizune said, nodding her conviction. "Unless… I know you were going to adopt him yourself, and I understand, but…"

"You know I gave up having kids of my own years ago, Shizune… With my position, you'd be a better mother for him anyway. You can give him the time and attention he needs when I'd be stuck in that damned office all day…" She chuckled.

"Tsunade-sama…" Shizune muttered, new tears forming in her eyes.

"Well, we'd better go talk to your son about having a new mom then, eh?" Tsunade said, chuckling again as she walked out into the hall.

---

(Present-)

"Mother!" Naruto yelled, burying his face into Shizune's chest, wrapping his arms around his new mother and holding her as tightly as he could while his tears soaked into her clothing. "I have a mother… my mother…"

After a few moments, Naruto fell asleep in his mother's arms, and she set him back down on his bed. "W-what happened?" Sakura asked.

"I think he got a little over-excited, and passed out." Tsunade explained. "It wouldn't be hard to over-stimulate him in his condition."

"Tsunade-sama…" Sakura started, drawing all eyes to her. "I… I'd like to train at the hospital… So that I can be near Naruto if he needs me, and so that no one I care about will ever die again…"

"Sakura…" Tsunade muttered.

"M-me too!" Hinata yelled, raising her hand. "I w-want to h-help N-Naruto-kun too…"

"Hn… looks like we've got us a couple new apprentices Shizune…" Tsunade muttered. "Fine… You'll both be here at the hospital every day you don't have a mission, Sundays off, and work under Shizune here." Tsunade indicated her apprentice as she spoke. "I'll stop by and train you two myself from time to time, but otherwise, you do as Shizune tells you, you got it?"

"Yes Tsunade-sama!" Sakura and Hinata both said eagerly.

"You'll start the same day as Naruto, coming in by eight just like him." Tsunade stated. "Although he might just come to work with his mother at five…"

"F-five? AM?" Sakura muttered.

"Yes." Tsunade said. "Shizune shows up early and takes care of managing the whole place… How she can handle the stress of that alongside finding and filing all my papers, I don't think I'll ever understand…"

"I work morning shifts at the hospital so that I have the rest of the day to help you, remember Tsunade-sama?" Shizune muttered.

"Ah, yeah… that's right." The Slug Sannin said. "Well, if you need to rearrange your schedule for your son, don't hesitate to say so."

"Yes, Tsunade-sama…" Shizune replied with a polite bow.

"Now all of you, shoo. His boy needs his sleep, and the grown-ups need to talk." Tsunade said, turning to the group.

"HEY! We're not _kids_ y'know!" Kiba yelled. "I don't care how old you are, ya' hag!"

All were surprised when instead of going ballistic, the Hokage simply turned to the boy calmly. "As soon as your balls drop, brat, _THEN_ I'll think about treating you like an adult." Tsunade said, matching the Inuzuka boy's vulgarity easily, leaving everyone in earshot thoroughly flabbergasted.

After a few moments, Gai spoke up. "Come now, all! It would be highly unyouthful to disobey a direct order!" He said as he ushered the Genin and one lazy Chuunin out of the room.

"Gai-sensei… you're simply saying that because you're afraid of Hokage-sama, aren't you?" Neji asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice. Gai replied with a long rant about 'youth' and 'vitality' and such that everyone knew equated to 'damn right I'm scared of her…'

When the only others left in the room were Kakashi and Shizune, Tsunade sighed and started again. "Okay… now, Shizune, I know your apartment is great for a single woman, or maybe even a couple, but it's not quite big enough for a family."

"I… I know Tsunade-sama…" Shizune said, her head hanging slightly. "I can pay for a bigger apartment if need be, and Naruto would be working as well… we should be able to manage easily on our own…"

"Why not use his father's house?" Kakashi asked lazily, his nose still in his little orange book. "I doubt Sandaime-sama would let anyone else move in there, and I believe it was part of his inheritance anyway…"

"Naruto isn't supposed to get anything until he's at _least_ fifteen…" Tsunade replied. "It says so in the papers we found…"

"You know… he needn't know it's rightfully his…" Kakashi muttered before disappearing in a puff of smoke.

"…He… _is _right, Tsunade-sama… and taxes should be cheaper than rent anyway…" Shizune muttered.

"Yeah… Let's go, Shizune… we've got paperwork to fill out…"

"Yes, Tsunade-sama…"

* * *

If you won't really understand it, 'the sum of Kyuubi's influence' is best summed up in computer terms… Think of Kyuubi like a hacker, Naruto's will as a computer, and the seal as a firewall between them. There are holes in the firewall and Naruto's mind, and once Kyuubi finds them and makes use of them to influence Naruto for an instant, Naruto's mind subconsciously blocks out those holes and makes it so Kyuubi can't use those same weak points again. Kyuubi _found_ all sorts of holes in Naruto's mind, and _saved them all up_ for one monumental push on Naruto's actions, which he used to kill Sasuke and cause Naruto to break down.

Just so y'know, 'unyouthful' isn't a word according to my computer's dictionary, but I'm using it anyway.

And come on… you know Shizune's 'mom' material. I mean, honestly, have you _seen_ that woman? She even LOOKS like a mom! I've talked it over with my Beta, PK, and we've agreed Shizune is the best mom Naruto could have in this fic. You might also be wondering why she lives in an apartment rather than wherever Tsunade lives… have you ever thought she might like some time to herself after spending the last _decade_ or two with Tsunade? Yeah.

Next chapter should be out relatively quickly, after all, I am on a roll. Apologies to the fans of my other fics, it may be a while before I get around to updating those…


	2. Home?

Okay, second chapter. I'm pretty excited about this fic, I mean, I've got a lot of it planned out already, but these first few chapters are a blank, so I'm just going to fill in the blanks and hope it works… XP

And if any of you are wondering; an 'epitaph' is something written in memory of the dead, such as the inscription on a tombstone or a work of literature dedicated to someone recently deceased. In essence, Naruto's life is like Sasuke's epitaph. (Thus the name of the fic)

It has been brought to my attention that some people don't think Shizune can be Naruto's mother due to her age. (I think that's just stupid, but hell, I'll explain anyway…) Shizune is 28 years old, while Naruto is 12. She is 16 years older than him. I think the problem here is that 16-year-old moms have a damn hard time being moms, mostly because they still have to learn how to take care of themselves as well as care for a helpless infant. Shizune is 28, while Naruto is 12, meaning he can already take care of himself in most cases. If you have any questions regarding this subject, please send me a PM, and I'll get back to you.

* * *

Naruto awoke the next morning in an unfamiliar bed, in an unfamiliar room. The bed seemed to be a simple double-sized mattress covered in colorful sheets, ruffled and disheveled from his presence. Looking around the room, the room had simple white walls, a sliding door obviously leading to a closet, a window overlooking Konoha's streets, a small wardrobe and a couple of shelves and a table lined with Scrolls, ninja equipment, and various trinkets. When the door to the room opened revealing a certain Jounin medic, Naruto glanced over curiously.

"Shizune-neechan?" Naruto muttered.

"That's 'kaa-chan' now, Naruto-kun…" Shizune said, smiling broadly.

"Oh yeah…" Naruto muttered as he remembered all of what happened the previous day. "So… where am I… Shizune-kaachan?" Naruto paused as he said it… it was just unreal… he had a _mother_ now, and this was going to take some getting used to.

"This is my apartment, Naruto-kun." Shizune said, smiling as she continued, "Now, do you want some breakfast?"

"Oh… what're we having? I'm starving…" Naruto said, sliding out of the bed and stretching with a groan.

_It looks like those anti-depressants are working, Tsunade-sama…_ Shizune thought as she watched her adopted son walk through the hallway into the combination kitchen/dining room. "Bacon, eggs, and toast… I hope that's enough…" Shizune said. She was new to the whole 'mom' thing, too. She and Tsunade had only finished the paperwork earlier that morning, and then only because they put off most of Tsunade's other work to do so.

"I… Shizune-kaachan…" Naruto muttered, looking down at the food on the table. "This is more than… I mean… I never expected you to _cook_ for me…"

"That's what mothers do, right?" Shizune asked, smiling.

"Y-yeah… I guess…" Naruto said. "I've never really known what it was like to have a mom, so… I don't know what a son is supposed to do either…"

Shizune looked down on her son sadly. "I'm sorry, Naruto-kun… I guess I can always do like my mother did, and other mothers I know…" She perked up slightly, trying to make sure she didn't negatively affect Naruto's mood in any way. "Now don't you worry about how to be a good son, just be yourself, and eat up; growing boys like you need a proper meal to start the day…"

"So… what _are_ we doing today?" Naruto asked between bites. "And… why aren't you having any?"

"Well, I already ate, and Tsunade-sama gave me the day off to move into our new home." Shizune answered.

"New… home?"

"Yes, Naruto-kun… my apartment isn't made for two, at least, not that way…" Shizune muttered with a tinge of pink on her cheeks.

"Well… where did you sleep last night?" Naruto asked.

"On the couch…" Shizune answered, noticing the look on Naruto's face, she continued. "Now, now, Naruto… I'm the mother; I can handle a night on the couch if it means my son gets to be comfy…"

At this, Naruto rose from his chair and walked over to embrace his adoptive mother. "Thanks… Kaachan…" After a few moments, Naruto looked up and tilted his head slightly. "Why didn't you just sleep in the bed too?"

Shizune blushed slightly. "Well… I'm your mother… it's just not good to sleep with my son…" She said, before mentally kicking herself for the way she worded it as Naruto jumped back several feet with a look akin to shock and horror coupled with a blush adorning his features.

"I wasn't talking about _THAT_, Kaachan!" Naruto yelled.

"I wasn't either!" Shizune said back, sighing heavily. "Being a mom is confusing…" As the moment passed, Naruto started to chuckle, then he started to laugh. Shizune couldn't help but giggle too, and then laugh herself. _Being a mom is hard, but it's worth it…_

---

After finishing breakfast, Naruto and Shizune walked over to his apartment to gather his things. "Well, this is it…" Naruto muttered as he turned the key in the lock, swinging the door open.

"Oh my… you weren't kidding when you said you had less to move than me…" Shizune said, more shocked at the _state_ of the apartment than its lack of furnishings. She could sum this place up in one word: dilapidated. "We're leaving the furniture…"

"Why?" Naruto asked as he began bagging up the ramen in his cupboards.

"They're all broken down and kinda' moldy… I think I saw the couch _move_…" Shizune whined playfully.

"Oh alright…" Naruto muttered, setting the bags aside. "The new place should have couches and beds already, right?"

"Yes, from what Tsunade-sama told me…" Shizune answered.

"Okay then… should manage this in one trip then…" Naruto said, moving into his room to fold up his sheets.

"What do you mean '_should_' manage?" Shizune asked as she took down several hanging plants. "What about your Kage Bunshin?" Naruto froze. He didn't know what to say… "Naruto-kun?" Shizune asked as she walked over to him and knelt down in front of him, placing her hands on his shoulders now that they were at eye level with each other. "Naruto… just because you're a civilian now, that doesn't mean you can't use jutsu anymore…" Shizune said as she looked into her son's tear-filled eyes. "Things like Kage Bunshin have lots of uses outside… shinobi work…" She caught herself, saying 'killing' in front of Naruto would just cause him to break down again.

"O-okay, Shizune-kaachan…" Naruto said with a weak smile. When his new mother backed away several feet, Naruto placed his hands in a familiar cross-shaped seal. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

Four Naruto clones popped into existence beside the original, and went to work packing up the rest of what Naruto wanted to keep. This took about five minutes without Shizune's help. "You see, Naruto?" Shizune said as they walked along the street towards their new home.

"Yeah…" Naruto muttered, wondering why they were heading out of the crowded residential districts.

As Shizune led Naruto and his clones through the streets with a map and a note with an address written on it, she was followed first by the original Naruto carrying his bags of ramen and what little of other kinds of food and utensils there were, then by the clone holding his TV and a bag of TV-related things hanging on his back, the clone carrying his sheets and clothes, one with the various plants and trinkets he had, and the last carrying Naruto's trusty microwave with various pictures and books cleverly stashed inside. After about another fifteen minutes of travel, they found themselves in front of a rather large building. "Wow…" Shizune muttered. "So this was _his_ house, huh?"

Naruto and his clones openly gaped at what could easily be called a small mansion, set on five acres of heavily forested land, with a winding path through the trees leaving it relatively invisible to those outside the property. "Th-this is… _our_ house?" Naruto asked skeptically.

"Yes, Naruto-kun… Tsunade-sama found that it wasn't being used, and decided that we might as well live here…" Shizune said, taking out a ring of small keys and walking up to the door.

"Unreal…" Naruto muttered under his breath. "Shizune-kaachan… I was wondering… who lived here?" Naruto asked as he and his clones followed behind.

"Well…" Shizune muttered, wondering just how much she should say. "This house _used_ to belong to the Yondaime Hokage…"

Naruto stopped. "Whoa… really?"

"Yes, Naruto-kun…" Shizune answered as she reached the door, which was oddly on the left side of the house, while most mansions had a door in the center, opening it after finding the right key. There was only one thing she could say at the sight past the door. "Wow…"

Before them was a large entrance hall that could easily fit ten or twenty people; with a large, ornate iron spiral staircase leading up to the second and third floors. The room was littered with paintings, vases, sets of armor, and other items from across the known world, each meticulously organized and cataloged. On the right side was a large archway about one-third of the way toward the staircase, and past that, a sliding door that easily blended into the wall if you weren't looking for it. "Holy shit…" Naruto muttered. "Yondaime was _rich_ wasn't he?"

"He was wealthy, yes… but I wouldn't say he was _rich_…" Shizune said as she led the way to the staircase. "When he was alive, he was probably the thirtieth or so wealthiest man in the country…"

"That's not rich?" Naruto asked in disbelief, at which his mother simply shrugged.

"Let's find you a room to put all that, Naruto-kun…" Shizune said, taking out a notepad Tsunade gave her. "Let's see… first floor is living space, second are guest and family rooms, and third was Yondaime-sama's private floor… let's take a look at that then, shall we?"

"Wait, you want to stick me in the master bedroom?" Naruto asked, and at a mix of a shrug and a nod from Shizune, he continued. "I thought the parents were supposed to get the master bedroom…"

"Naruto, trust me… you need the extra space more than I do." Shizune said as she started to climb the staircase before playfully adding; "What if you bring a girl home?"

Naruto and his clones blushed, almost dropping his stuff recoiling from the question. After a moment, Naruto thought up a question of his own. "What about you? I'm not the only one who could bring someone home y'know…"

Shizune blushed and looked over the railing at the boy. "Trust me, Naruto-kun… it's a lot more likely that _you'll_ bring home a girlfriend before I can find a boyfriend… besides, if I do, we could always go to his house…" She said in an oddly cheery tone. "Besides, I can always split my stuff between the other rooms. You've got a whole apartment to put in _one_…"

"Yeah, but…" Naruto muttered as he too started ascending the stairs.

"No 'buts' mister… I'm your mother and I want you to have the better room. End of discussion." Shizune said, trying her hand at a commanding motherly tone.

"Yes, Kaachan…" Naruto said as he tried to catch up to her.

When they reached the second floor, Shizune flipped through the notepad looking for information. "Apparently one of these is a bathroom… third on the left I think." She said, looking down the hall. There were six rooms on the second floor, three on each side. "I'll probably take the room at the end; closest to the bathroom." Shizune said with a wink.

Naruto shuddered slightly before they continued up the stairs. The third floor was blocked by a thin sliding door that Shizune said probably had a trap to it, unlocking the small lock on the door and sliding it open, handing the key to this door along with a front door key to Naruto, should he ever choose to actually _use_ the lock. Walking into the hallway, there were three doors, one on either side and at the end. "That last one should be to the roof…" Shizune said, turning to the door on the left. "This should be the master bedroom, and the other was Yondaime-sama's private study…"

Unlocking the room to the left, Shizune swung the door open, revealing what was easily the biggest bed Naruto had ever seen. "Whoa…" The blonde muttered. The room was extremely simplistic compared to the rest of what he'd seen of the house. Not a single painting or expensive vase in sight… Just a wardrobe, shelves and tables with a few pictures in frames scattered about, along with the massive bed up against the center of the far wall. "Where do those doors go?" Naruto asked, indicating two doors on the right wall.

"Those should be the closet and bathroom…" Shizune said, standing in front of them. The door to the right was a sliding door, obviously the closet, while the left was a 'western' hinged door, like the door to the bedroom. Sliding the closet door open, Shizune stepped back and openly gaped at what she saw; five Jounin outfits, two formal men's kimono, two rather bland looking orange and red yukata, and a spare set of Hokage robes.

"So this really _was_ his house…" Naruto muttered, picking up the Hokage headdress that was leaned against the wall under the robes.

"He sure liked to be prepared for anything, didn't he?" Shizune asked shyly, pulling open one of the drawers and doors of the wardrobe in the room. "It looks like he kept all his informal and non-mission clothing in here… aside from those yukata…" _Of course the yukata wouldn't really fit in here…_

Naruto opened the door to the bathroom, poked his head inside, backed away and shut the door again. It wasn't much more than a normal bathroom, but it was still pretty big, but what he could barely stand was the ethereal _glow_ everything in there seemed to give off… Shizune opened the door herself and muttered, "Maybe I _do_ want this room…"

"Kaachan, come on… let's finish looking around and go get your stuff." Naruto said, breaking her from her reverie.

They crossed the hall, Shizune unlocking the door to the study. It took Naruto a moment to register the fact that he hadn't just walked into a library. The entire room was lined with shelves filled with books, save the space in the corner to their right that held a desk riddled with paper, ink, and other writing utensils, and a door to their left. "Well, now we know we'll never run out of reading material…" Shizune muttered. "That door leads to Yondaime-sama's 'jutsu vault', but I doubt you'd have any need to get in there, being a civilian now and all. Plus I'm pretty sure there's a blood seal, so only Yondaime-sama and his blood relatives could get in…" _You wouldn't have any trouble though, Naruto-kun…_ Walking over to the desk, she picked up a small orange book and examined its cover. After a moment, she shrieked, dropped the book, and yelled; "OH NO! YONDAIME-SAMA WAS A PERVERT!!!"

Naruto walked over and picked up the book, opening it to the publishing page. "Icha Icha; First Edition…" Naruto read, before he started chuckling. "So, Yondaime got the first printed copy, eh?" _I wonder if Kakashi-sensei would like this… _He thought, setting it back down on the desk. "We can go through the books later, let's check out the rest of the house…"

Shizune nodded, still slightly hyperventilating as she led Naruto out of the study. "Hey, what's that door?" Naruto asked.

"That leads to the roof, I think…" Shizune answered, walking over to the door to find it unlocked. "That's odd…"

Opening the door, she was faced with a small room about the size of an average closet, with a large iron door on the other side, and another wooden door to the left. As Shizune tried to open the iron door, which had an peculiar locking mechanism for its equally strange lever-latch handle, Naruto made his way to the other door, which lacking a lock, opened easily. "Wow… he really did overdo everything, didn't he?" Naruto asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice as he stared down what amounted to a small armory.

"I… think he had this here in case he needed to leave in a hurry…" Shizune muttered as she looked over his shoulder at full kunai pouches, shuriken holsters, and small first-aid kits; about a dozen of each. Along the left wall hung five spare Jounin vests, and under them were lined dozens of scrolls of incrementally varying size on small shelves. There were three of each of the clearly labeled scrolls, varying from things like 'Fire Sealing Scroll' to 'Multiple Enemy Paralysis Scroll' or 'Explosive Scroll' and things neither Naruto nor Shizune could recognize. They _did_ note a few standard cargo scrolls labeled with things like 'spare rations' or 'drinking water' as well. It was true… the Yondaime held to the old proverb 'better over-prepared than under-prepared' almost religiously. On the right wall were wall-mounted shelves lined with things like bandages, outdated communications equipment, even two spare Konoha Hitai-ite, and strangely, a katana and two ANBU swords lined up under them. The most peculiar items were a small rack of ten three-pronged kunai, with two pouches labeled to contain more of the same under them. Then Shizune noticed there were two of these odd kunai missing from the rack, apparent by their open, unused spaces. This led her to look around the room once more and take note that there was one of _everything_ missing, aside from the swords and scrolls. She let out a silent, morbid chuckle. "So, he left to fight the Kyuubi, and no one bothered to put everything back…" She said, tears forming in her eyes.

Naruto looked up at her and examined the room again himself. "Hn… I guess not…" Naruto muttered, walking back out into the hallway and starting down the stairs.

Shizune watched as her son stalked away in a mix of rage and depression, and felt the tears streaming down her cheeks. _Maybe he wouldn't be so angry or sad… if he knew Yondaime-sama was his father…_ she thought, wiping away her tears and jogging to catch up to the blonde.

Following her son downstairs to the open hall, Shizune watched as he walked through the large archway into the dining room, which was made to comfortably seat at least ten people, more if need be… Above the low-lying table around which were situated several sitting pillows was a fairly good-sized chandelier made from what looked like sky-blue crystal. It was 'fairly good sized' by the standard that it would be utterly _huge_ back in his tiny apartment, but in this large room, it looked rather small… There were several nigh-identical potted plants around the room, or rather, one in each corner, while a small pile of spare pillows for extra guests were neatly stacked just to the right of the entrance to the room, next to what looked like an overgrown bonsai tree. Aside from the plants and the chandelier, though, the room looked rather bland with its plain dark-orange painted walls… Shizune assumed this was to keep the family and friends dining together focused on each other, and encouraging conversation.

After taking in his fill of the room, Naruto stepped through the only doorway in the room other than the main arch they entered from. This led to the kitchen, which was large by house standards, but surprisingly smaller than most mansions have; some of which, like the Hyuuga's, even rivaled those of restaurants. This room had two other doors, one obviously leading to the pantry, and Naruto led Shizune through the other on the left wall, into the laundry room. It was rather… standard. Reminding Naruto of the laundry room back at his apartment building, actually… it had shelves with white towels, and a washer/dryer set, as well as a small utility closet containing the cleaning supplies and various spare hygiene products for the place. This room too, had a pair of doors, a sliding door on the far side which Naruto opened to confirm that it was the other door in the entrance hall, and another opposite the washer and dryer, through a short hallway.

This other door, led out back… to the path leading to the familial bath. "We have our own onsen?" Naruto asked after opening the western-style door.

"Apparently…" Shizune said, walking down the path toward it to investigate as Naruto stepped onto the lawn. There was only one word that could describe this place…

Green…

Everything, everywhere, was green. The tightly packed trees surrounding the property were covered in moss, the lawn looked to be well-kept, and the flower bed was overrun with weeds. Even the paint for the house was a deep forest green… strangely, the first thing that popped into Naruto's mind when he saw it (Well, third… the first was how he couldn't believe how green this place was, and the second wondering how a certain pair of green-clad freaks would react to seeing it) was how he would've given almost anything to have a backyard like this to play in while he was growing up, which led him to think of children of his own, which in turn led to his face shifting to a deep crimson.

"Naruto!" Shizune called after exiting the small bath house. "I _love_ this place!!!"

This caused Naruto to give off a half-hearted chuckle… "Yeah, I do too." He answered. "Come on, Okaa-chan, let's go get your stuff…"

* * *

I'd like to say now that despite this being a NaruHarem, said harem is not up for discussion. I've already picked out the girls, and any new additions past those will be _my _decision.

Tomorrow marks Naruto's first day of civilian work at none other than the Ichiraku!

I don't like the fact that I never made my 4K word mark, but it's _damn_ close at 3.4K…

Another thing; pretty soon I plan on putting up a thread on a forum board I help administrate regarding update status of -and discussion regarding- my fics. You'll find the link to the forum in my profile under 'my homepage', as well as _where_ to find the topic _ON _said forum. The stuff about my fics is only ONE thread. The rest of it is an RP/anything else site.


	3. Chapter 3

Okay. I've tried. I really have. I just can't find the spark to write anymore. Maybe I'll pick it up again later, like when college isn't eating up all of my writing time anyway, but for now...

Consider this fic discontinued.

I know, I promised it'd get done, but hey... my GPA comes first.


End file.
